Poland - Land of My Mother - Part 2

I'm driving to Warsaw, wanting to get there before nightfall to make it easier to find the hotel. It was about 6pm when I was 30 kilometers away from the hotel in Warsaw, roughly 20-45 minutes depending on traffic. I was driving on a divided highway moderately populated with vehicles traveling around 100kph, as was I. Along a slightly wooded area with a few buildings and side streets, a man stepped out off the side of the road with what appeared to be a ping pong/table tennis paddle. He was moderately gesturing with it in a motion that meant, "slow down" to me, and brake lights came on all around me. Several kilometers down the road a motorcycle cop rolls up beside and with his lights on. So, I pull over and he stops in front of me. Walking over to me, he speaks in Polish, obviously, and of course I tell him I don't speak the language. He asks for my license, which I give to him and he drives off, but stops about 50 meters in front of me and looks back at me. So, I take that as "follow me, you dumb ass" and drive up to where he is. We make a u-turn and head back to where the guy with the paddle was standing, but now I see there are about a half dozen police there, 2 or 3 motorcycles and a couple of cars. I can recognize what this is no matter what country I'm in - Speed Trap. Out of all the cars in the group I was traveling in that were going the same speed, I'm the one the hunted down and brought back. I honestly didn't know what the problem was, because as I just wrote we were all traveling at the same rate, I had made no lane changes, nothing obviously wrong with the car. So, a lot of Polish being directed in my direction and the old guy with the paddle was especially agitated with me (join the club). I simply said I have no idea what you are saying. Eventually a cop came over who spoke limited English, and through trial and error he told me the speed limit where they are standing is 50kph and there's a fine for going over that, and a fine for not stopping when I was waved at with the paddle (which explained grandpa's anger at me because obviously he takes his paddle work quite seriously). I told the semi-English speaking cop I didn't see any change in the speed limit as I was traveling along with everyone else, and I had no idea that the paddle gestures meant for me alone to stop. I didn't even recognize the guy holding the paddle to be wearing a uniform, as he popped out at the last moment as the group of cars traveled by. No matter according to the cop. I am to pay something like a 1000 Zloty fine (€230/$320), 500 for speeding and 500 for not stopping. When I told them I did not have that they said no problem they would take me to an ATM. I requested a ticket be written and they dragged their heels on that. As I began to shift from ignorance of what happened, to apologetic for the misunderstanding, and then anger at the attempt at extortion, the mood changed. I called the hotel to inform them I would be late, and explained what was happening. The man at the hotel said what the sops were doing was not right and I should contact my embassy. He provided the number and I started placing calls, first getting London and finally making contact with the American Consul in Poland. While all of this was going on my new police friends were looking at their watches and saying time was going by. I said I was in no hurry, which was true because I didn't have to pick Radhika up at the airport until 10pm. An hour went by as I walked around, leaned on the trunk of my car, and kept the cell phone to my ear. Another cop who could speak good English was called out, and he spoke good English. He covered the same ground that the other cop did, and I responded with what I had already expressed. He told me I should know all the traffic laws of the countries I visit. I told him I seriously doubt he would know ALL of the traffic rules and regulations of the USA if he were to visit there. I also informed him that I have driven all over Europe and have had no difficulties (other than my flinger-flipping incident in Belgium which conveniently slipped my mind). In Poland, they have a sign rectangular in shape, which shows the silhouette of the skyline of a city. I understood that to be an entering a "city limit" sign, because there was another almost exactly like it however it had a slash through it, and it was always located when it looked like you were leaving a city. But in fact, that sign means the speed limit is 50kph. The cop asked me if Amsterdam or the US had the same sign. I said "No! They are silly that way. For some reason the just post the numerical digit of what the speed limit is. I have not seen this sign anywhere outside of Poland." He was surprised. So much went back and forth between these two cops and me. I became more obstinate as the minutes ticked away, and at one point said how unfair and underhanded their tactics were. When I finally made contact with the American Consul and brought her up to speed, the cop said he didn't want to talk to her. By now, it was getting dark, and as much as I hate mosquitoes I was loving the fact that these guys were constantly fighting off these especially aggressive pests. By now, they had pretty much wrapped up their little enterprise, and most of the cops were huddled in my area or ducked into cars to avoid the pesky little blood suckers. I made a strong effort to slowly and nonchalantly wave away any mosquitoes in my area to project they weren't too much of a concern to me. Anyway, I asked the cop why he was afraid to talk to her. He said he wasn't afraid, but it was due to her inability to speak Polish. I asked her, and she said of course she speaks fluent Polish. I informed the cop, and he had no recourse but to take the phone from me. They spoke for a brief time, he handed the phone back to me, and she said I could leave. I asked her what she said to him, and it was the exact same things I had said to him. I paused my conversation with her, thanked them and apologized for the misunderstanding, and they all smiled and asked me to drive with care, and then resumed my conversation with her for a few minutes more. The cops, cars, and motorcycles were gone within 30 seconds. The realization that there was no money coming from me, their impatience, the mosquitoes, or a combination of all 3 caused a hasty retreat. I thanked her for her help and called the hotel to say I was on my way. Confirming my concerns, finding the hotel under darkness was difficult. Calling the hotel and getting step-by-step directions was not efficient, so I told the guy I would just keep him on the line until I was on site. Closed roads and construction which did not appear on the map made it extremely difficult on my own, and one of the last directions I received by the hotel was to ignore the sign that indicates you cannot drive down this road, because it is the only way to get to our hotel!! So, I parked the car, checked in and put my luggage in the room, and then took a cab to the airport to pick-up Radhika, as I was done driving for the day! David, the guy at the hotel who provided such excellent support received a well-deserved gratuity from me!! The next day we did a full day of sightseeing in Warsaw, and really enjoyed the city. We received several "advisories" of even "warnings" about Poland (the roads are in bad shape) and Warsaw (quite boring and mostly new because more than 80% was destroyed by the Germans in WWII). Outside of the first 40 to 60 kilometers after crossing into Poland from Germany in the south, which were completely terrible and allowed for a max speed of about 40kph, the rest of the roads weren't much different than roads in Amsterdam. And we really enjoyed Warsaw and would recommend a visit to anyone considering it. The next day we drove to Lublin to visit that small city farther east and it's Majdanek Concentration Camp. We enjoyed that city too, and the camp was an interesting experience. Our hotel was a bit of a disappointment, as any information they seemed to provide to us was wrong. But we stuffed ourselves with many varieties of pierogies, potato pancakes, and Polish beer and had a good time. We went back to Warsaw the next morning, arriving in the afternoon and sightseeing that evening and part of the next day until mid-afternoon, when I drove Radhika to the airport for her flight to Amsterdam. I immediately hit the road, expecting to stop somewhere near the Polish-German border east of Berlin, which is what came to be. However, not before encountering the worst rainstorm I remember from recent memory. Florida can dish out some heavy water in the summer, and I recall one way back in '84-'85 in Indiana with a girlfriend, but this one was at night, visibility seemed to be feet if not inches. The sound of the pounding rain and wind was deafening. I could see by the illumination of the headlights that the wind was blowing the rain horizontally at times! Vehicles were off to the side, emergency blinkers on, under bridges, and this was no flash rainstorm. It lasted for a very long time. You would drive for a while after it let up for a moment, and then start pounding the car in the blink of an eye. I made it to the first hotel, one that was on my list to consider when I came upon it probably somewhere around 9:30pm. Not the ideal place, but not so bad either. Logistically it was just what I wanted, only a few minutes from Germany where the navigation would take over and direct me back to Amsterdam when I left in the morning. And that's exactly what happened. I slid through Germany on their great highway system without too many delays (roads are always being repaired in Germany and if you're not caught in a backup you are very lucky) and made it to Amsterdam in the late afternoon. Another adventure came to a close.